“It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open one’s mouth, and remove all doubt.” -Abraham Lincoln
In 2011, Nerds, Geeks, Dweebs and Dorks have come out of the shadows. An unexpected upside to social networking and the proliferation of written communication versus other forms is that intelligence has been placed at the forefront. While this is a wonderful development in many ways, with any drastic shift such as this comes downsides of the sudden upheaval. Rather than simply bask in the chance to shine, some of the intellectually endowed have taken to belitting and even bashing those who have never before had to show what they used to simply tell. Even simple misspellings and typos can be met with harsh criticism. It is not at all uncommon to see a blog post followed by comments consisting of 75% #corrections. And if a mistake is made on Twitter… Forget about it.
We now live in an era of reposts, retweets, and screen captures. Anything you say, be it intended for a large audience, or simply one person, can be spread to the masses at the click of a button.
All of this is added to the already existing challenge that is communication.
But let’s get back to conversation, in the traditional sense. You know, when voices, and *gasp* even eye contact is involved. Before people became so fixated on whether a person thought they were supposed to use “there,” “their,” or “they’re,” people analyzed what a person MEANT when they spoke. The spirit behind the words being used.
I often refer to The Four Agreements, one of which is to “Be Impeccable with Your Word.” All too often, people fling about nouns and verbs, with very little thought. Even before society communicated so much in black and white, it has always been the case that once words have been said, they cannot be taken back. I’m sure we all have a story (or several) regarding something we once said that we are still feeling the effects of.
Now.
While I do not call myself a teacher, providing others with knowledge and insight has always come naturally to me. I have also tended to get good grades (especially when I apply myself) and speak proper English. I long ago embraced the fact that I am a nerd. Before it was trendy, before there was a #Team or a cool name for the eclectic fashion sense, I knew that my interest in books and learning versus a desire to be fashionable or popular cemented my position, and I was okay with that. I have also always understood and appreciated that not everybody is like me.
“All I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don’t break them for no one.” -Tony Montana, Scarface
I’m not going to get into “scary” vs. “scared” (as much as I would like to). Have you ever heard someone say something like, for example, “Target closes at 10 today,” then, upon realizing that it is Sunday, say “Oh, I lied, it’s Sunday, Target closes at 9 today.” If I happen to be around, I am likely to point out that you didn’t LIE, you were mistaken.
Some might say that I am correcting in a grammatical sense. My rationale is that 1) A lie is intentionally saying something that isn’t true, which was not the case, and 2) Most people consider lying to be a major offense, so why would you so loosely use such a word about yourself? Given the number of quotes pertaining to one’s word being one of very few things that one has in life, why would one want to describe something they said as something that is universally considered to be such a heinous misdeed? This is not a case of “who” versus “whom.” If I called you a liar in almost any circumstance, you would be greatly offended. It would be a big deal. It may even end our friendship. So, why would I condone you doing the same to yourself, ESPECIALLY if you did not actually lie?
Would you think I was nitpicking your grammar, or encouraging you to be impeccable with your word? Lecturing you, or impressing upon you the importance of “Say what you mean, and mean what you say”?
Am I capable of acting as the grammar police? Yes. Do I do so? Only when paid to, or asked explicitly for my editing/proofreading skills.
The REAL question is, why get mad at someone else when you are the one who was careless with your words? Why would you not want to avoid being called a liar, for any reason? Furthermore, I’m actually saying something positive, so if you respond negatively, it is you starting #FightMe2011, not me.
Even with the best of intentions, situations don’t always work out the way we think or hope that they will. Often, we will walk away from a situation with our only comfort being that our heart was in the right place. That may get lost in translation from time to time, but we can try our best to be selective when we try to express.
(Please note, this post in NO way condones #sellabent, #FlamingYoung, #SeizureSalad, or #Alphet.)
